Even then, it was never really all that simple.

After watching The Way We Were for the 500th dozen time, I actually started to realize something. Perhaps it's the wisdom that comes with age, or I am just in a completely different place in my life than I ever have been, but something shifted in my perception of the interpretation of this epic movie, and the (formerly ill) fates of those involved.

I'm not going to do one of my quppy movie recaps (as I am certain I have done exactly that with this movie at some point in my blogging...) but I am going to sum it up with this: A fiercely independent woman falls hopelessly for a dreamy man who grows to love her just as fiercely as her, but in the end, chooses to opt out.

Here come the waterworks. How sad, how tragic. Just another modern day Romeo and Juliet: star-crossed lovers who don't end up living happily ever after. Every time I see it, I bawl. "Why oh why does Katie have to end up without Hubble?" "Why does he have to be such an asshole?" "Why can't they just stick together, they have a child for God's sake...why can't they just work it out?" And then, in what probably was the ORIGINAL "awkward ex run-in" on the street, we see that both parties come out alive. Yes, they are okay, but wouldn't they have been so much better together? They were MEANT for each other...or were they?

A close friend of mine described a great love as one where both parties give it all: everything they have, and whatever that is, plays out. As society has made us love-obsessed, over time, great love has equaled "successful ending in love." Marriage. Happily ever after. Kids. House. Growing Old. ETC.

What if, though, just what IF we entertain the possibility that being great in love AND life equals "messy as hell." Broken hearts. Blood. Tears. Tragedy. PAIN. Happiness. Being REAL and true to everyone and yourself. Not being perfect on paper, or kissing until the credits roll.

Now that is a daring suggestion for the ending to our movie lives, huh?

So back to the story at hand, Hubble and Katie. Lots of people claim to watch this movie, and even a racous sex and the city episode has portrayed parts of it, but believe me when I say, I am an expert. I have been watching this movie religiously with my mom since I was SEVEN years old. So this Hubble character, I pretty much have figured out. And let me tell you, apart from his dreamy heartthrob looks, he wasn't THAT great. He had asshole friends and an arrogance that could make Napoleon seem humble. Never accepting humility or the possibility that he could learn a thing or two, we constantly see him take his "lawful place in his social hierachy" making Katie often feel she was a day late and a dollar short.

The crazy thing is, what made Hubble so great is how much Katie loved and believed in him.. (Must I remind you, Mr. Redford didn't receive any awards for that performance, Mrs. Streisand took all of them...)

So that's it. He WAS: only because of her. What a "non-perfect ending" type of statement.

I remember, when I was around 14, (I am ASHAMED to say) that I used to be EMBARRASSED for Katie! I would cringe at the way she was so loud and obnoxious and wouldn't take social clues from her beloved to just sit there and stop talking or thinking. She was always over the top; always so fiercely passionate about EVERY SINGLE LITTLE THING! I used to think, why can't she just shutup! She is going to run off the greatest thing that ever happened to her (let's face it, he's WAY better looking than her...) I would ask my mom, "Mama, what is WRONG with her? I seriously don't understand. No wonder why he left her. She never shutup. She never stopped." My mom would tell me then, that one day she hoped I would understand.

I think that day just happened. I get it. She never stopped...because that was who she was. She never stopped being herself. Hubble lied to himself for years..for the rest of his life. He was never honest with himself; he couldn't ever admit that he was ever wrong. It was so much easier to believe the lies he told himself; to drown in his shallow friends, alcohol and his social privleges. He fell for Katie because she represented the one thing he didn't (and subsequently could never) have: to be real. True. Crazy in everything she did and believed in.

What an earth-shattering revelation.

So back to the movie review. I still cry everytime. But for the first time EVER, in my 21 years of my relationship with this movie, I am not crying for the love lost. Let's face it, it was a great love. I cry, for Hubble. It IS sad. It is so sad that she wasted so much time on someone who would never be the man she knew he could be. And the crazier thing, SHE was the ONLY woman who would ever believe in him or love him as much. And he still couldn't handle it. He still chose to give up on himself, and everything that WAS real about his life.

In the last "run-in" scene, the tender looks they give to each other sums it all up: He was at his very best when he was with her, but he never deserved it. She's better than ever, because she grew and never betrayed herself. And all that's left is "the way we were."

Some people will never understand the power of love. And to that I say, those people don't deserve that kind of love. The kind that Katie never hesitated to give. Sometimes in life, we give more than we get. But we should ALL take a page from Miss Katie Morosky and to NEVER compromise who you are, especially for love.

And you may leave several people in your wake, but they'll never forget, and eventually you'll receive exactly the kind of love you give. And we all deserve that.