Is that scaffolding down yet????

A new year and a new life...that comes every year like clockwork.

So it's another year. I think the saying is something like, "celebrate endings, for they mark new beginnings." For me, celebrating endings has become a religious routine of sorts.

Let me explain. As my co-workers can attest, I measure the passage of time and life in a very peculiar way: through the ending of events, monuments and other happenings set by someone else. For example, when NM/Target launched their new collection for Christmas, it was a set start and end date. My response: "OMG I can't wait til that is over!"

Construction on the 6 train will last from x date through x date? "God, I can't wait til they are finished."

That scaffolding across the street from Bloomingdales? You guessed it, counting the days until it goes down. An observatory habit, I mentally count the passage of time through things that neither directly affect me or are controlled by me.

When you put it that way, it's a little alarming and quite frankly very, very strange. Why should I care? That scaffolding could be up for YEARS. The trains? Forget it, they are NEVER going to be working the right way. In this way of time measurement, time is actually of no essence, and patience is key, for you could literally be waiting your whole life for these events to actually be over.

For another year, here I am. Single, making it on my own in this amazingly creative whirlwind of a city. I work, date, sleep, live all on my own. I juggle all my own balls. Some days are definitely better than others, but for the most part, I have no relief from this single life. So, as it flies by, instead of counting days on a calendar, I lend the task to something I don't have to juggle.

Say what you will, but the exhilarating feeling that comes from seeing Derek Lam slippers in a clearance bin or finally seeing the sun peek at you after months of a wooden view is definitely unmatched to anything else. So this year, I am going to try to apply these principles to other areas of my life, the main principle being patience.

Every new year brings the same fleeting moments: do this, do that, change this, change that: as soon as possible. With no regard to lasting results, we FLY through our New Year's resolutions: a checklist that doesn't wait for prescribed dates. It's a race to the finish, and oftentimes, we suffer in its path.

So, as crazy as this sounds, I am not going to do this for once. I am going to harness all my willpower, and go with the flow. Follow the unprescribed dates. I'm not going to demand answers just because someone says it's time. I'm not going to rush to change my hair just for a change. I'm not going to talk to someone differently or be a different person because they want me to be. I am going to let life just happen, with the end date directly dependent upon when it just needs to be (I'm talking to you, scaffolding).

I know this really makes no sense to most people, but I will say if you take anything away from this, remember that life is what we make it.
If we make it full of supposed to be's, deadlines and controlled endings, it will never reach the potential it could.

But maybe, just maybe, if we make it full of let's just see what happens, genuine actions and reactions, (and, of course, the MTA's scheduled construction dates), I think we will find that the best part of life is not what we try to fix, start over and fix again, it's what is already there.