A patient of patience.

Well, if you can believe it, It is almost 3 months to the day that I will be....can I say it??? The big three -OH. In a lot of ways, I feel like my life has been leading up to this moment for my entire existence. (Not to be too dramatic or anything.)

With a mere 90 days left in my 20s, I have decided to begin a sort of reflection on all that I have learned throughout the years. Just a journal; a tiny contribution of a life lived (so far) with tons of adventures and even more mistakes.

The lesson harping on me as of late is that tricky little lesson of being patient. Waiting for the right time that everything simply comes together. I am reminded by one of my favorite Bible passages, found in Ecclesiastes: "To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under Heaven..." Wow, is this not the most truthful statement ever uttered???

Life is all about timing. I  have spent over half of mine in the wrong timing; not being patient to wait for what was meant to happen. To wait until I had gained more experience, to wait until I got to know the guy better, to wait until the light turned green. Just wait; trust that feeling deep in your heart; and to listen to it. To wait even when things are hard; or when they don't seem to make sense.

And guess what? It's a lesson I am still learning. My approach to life has always been a bit unorthodox; (something I am proud of and refuse to apologize for) when I want to do something, and it seems pretty fruitful and possible, I just go ahead and do it. It's a bit of an impulsive life version of Russian Roulette.

But then...something happened. I ran out of patience. I took one too many risks, and ended up having to move back in with my parents and lost everything. If I had only waited a bit longer....
But I have to remember, the lesson I am sharing is not one of regret, but of reflection.

Patience sometimes means sticking it out, even if I don't want to. Even if there is $450 million dollars on number 36 and I am committed to 32; staying on 32 is the ultimate challenge and true test of patience. (A roulette analogy for those of you who love it as much as me). Patience teaches virtute. It develops calmness, and helps keep you centered. It also teaches you how to control the crazy. It forces you to reflect within yourself while staying in one place; and to recognize that my time will come. Basically, for a mover like me, until some hard lessons were learned, patience was my kryptonite.

So how is this lesson faring as of late? Currently, I am testing myself to the capacity I never knew I could. I am actually, as we speak, learning this lesson of patience...I AM STAYING PUT...and guess what? I am SURVIVING.

So that's it. It will definitely be a lesson that will reach new highs and lows, especially as I continue to experience so many amazing things that life has to offer, but for me, patience has a new place in my life. Just one reason turning 30 won't be a total loss. (hopefully there will be about 90 more...)